Secrets to a Happy Life

I have struggled with depression since the age of 12. I have been to two psychiatrists, three therapists, have taken medication (and still currently do), and I have a Bachelor's of Science Degree in Psychology. I've studied Wicca, Satanism, Buddhism, Taoism, Shintoism, Judaism, you name it. I've meditated, tried contacting spirit guides, tried astral projection. 

Let's just say - I'VE BEEN THROUGH IT YA'LL.

Am I the authority on all things mental health? Of course not. But I can tell you what has worked for me.

Spoiler Alert: None of the above. So keep reading 😜

This isn't going to get preachy, or at least I'll try not to. I started going to Lighthouse Church in 2018. I was baptized in 2020. And since 2020, I have not had any major depressive episodes or thoughts of suicide. Take from that what you will.

What has worked for me?

- Limit consumption of mass media. Media is designed to make you feel depressed and lacking. Otherwise, how could they sell you things to make you better? I'm not saying completely disconnect. But limit your time on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and watching the news. There's a difference between being informed and consuming. Also, you'll feel like real 💩 once you realize how much time you waste just endlessly scrolling.

- Practice gratitude daily. It's so easy to marinate on everything we don't have. We seldom take time to consider all that we do. Your security, safety, health, running water, your home, your family. Even when life really sucks, we still have so much to be grateful for. Especially if you live in the United States. Once you start practicing gratitude, your entire outlook eventually shifts from focusing on what you don't have to focusing on what you do. This is the shift that changes your mental state from depression to hopeful. This is probably the biggest secret.

- Stay connected. I don't have any friends that I interact with on a regular basis. I have my husband and my family. But even talking to them everyday, or calling my dad, makes a huge difference even if it's just a 3 minute phone call. Don't isolate yourself. And, if you're like me and you really have no one, you'll have to make an extra effort to put yourself out there. It's scary and out of your comfort zone but you will be SO PROUD OF YOURSELF once you do! And it gets easier once you do it the first time! This can be going to church, walking around your neighborhood, or going to the library which is a great start since there's no expectation of talking to anyone.

- Stay busy. And I don't mean working. Play with your kids, your pets. Do things that make you happy. You don't always need to be productive. Read, craft, play cards, watch movies or television (positive ones!), go for a walk. But DO DO DO. The less you do, the more time you have to sit in your head and think. You need to turn the focus from inside to outside.

- Find faith. Humans were created for a purpose. That purpose isn't to just consume, endure the highs and lows, and then die. We were created to serve and to worship something higher than ourselves. Giving my life to Christ has changed my life. I was not raised as a Christian and I did not come to my decision lightly. One of the most influential books I've read was I Don't Have Enough Faith to Be an Athiest by Frank Turek and Norman Geisler. It walks you through logical arguments regarding faith. Even if your opinion remains unchanged and even if you decide that faith isn't for you - find opportunities to give, serve, and volunteer. We are happiest when we are giving and purposeful. I promise you. You will begin to believe in your value and self worth when you start giving of yourself.

Pain is temporary. Darkness is temporary even though it doesn't feel like it. Life gets better, situations change. There is always hope. THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE.